Why are we afraid of death and dying? Are we afraid of death itself or of the dying process? For many, dying can take a very long time while for others it is instantaneous or comes quickly after a diagnosis or accident. The process of dying is not usually a pleasant one for the person who is dying or for family and friends. When one has known for months or even years that a loved one has a terminal illness, when the person dies it is still a shock and very painful. I can relate to this situation very well as my Dad had a stroke leaving him unable to speak and with minimal use of his right limbs for 7 years before he finally succumbed. My Mum suffered for 6 months before she died. In each case, even though others expected us to be prepared for these deaths, it was very painful when the final moment came.
Why are we afraid of death and dying? Are we afraid of death itself or of the dying process? For many, dying can take a very long time while for others it is instantaneous or comes quickly after a diagnosis or accident. The process of dying is not usually a pleasant one for the person who is dying or for family and friends. When one has known for months or even years that a loved one has a terminal illness, when the person dies it is still a shock and very painful. I can relate to this situation very well as my Dad had a stroke leaving him unable to speak and with minimal use of his right limbs for 7 years before he finally succumbed. My Mum suffered for 6 months before she died. In each case, even though others expected us to be prepared for these deaths, it was very painful when the final moment came.
So again, is it the process of dying or death itself that we fear? Up to 84% of the world’s population declares to have a faith of some kind, Christian, Jewish, Hindu, Islam, Bhuddist, Rastafarian, some traditional beliefs as well as others. I researched to see what each of these believes happens after death. First, we must acknowledge that, whether we like it or not, we WILL die; we will leave this earthly life. Interestingly, all of these religions believe that there is some form of life after death, even though there are as many beliefs of this as there are religions it would seem. Briefly, this is what I found:
Christianity – “once you die, your soul goes to heaven…to live eternal life with God”
Judaism – “The soul is believed to stay near the body for a few days after death, and then go to the next world to be judged. After death the soul returns to G-d (Koheles 12:7)”;
Hinduism – “…time is cyclical … people do not live and die just once but are reborn a number of times before reaching their final state.”
Islam – “Everything, positively everything, speaks for the probability of an existing world of other substance, which the average person of today is unable to see.”
Buddhism – “death is not the end of life, it is merely the end of the body we inhabit in this life, but our spirit … seek out through the need of attachment to a new body and new life.”
Rastafarianism – “… believe in “zion” or heaven. We all go to zion.”
Traditional religions – “life does not end with death, but continues in another realm.”
Atheism – do not believe in any form of god or spiritual life
Agnosticism – not sure if any god or other form of special spiritual life is real. No 2 agnostics totally agree with one another.
Looking at each of these religions, with the exception of the last 2, it would seem that 84% of the world’s people should not be afraid of death. The overall belief seems to be that we either go to spend a spiritual life with God or similar deity/realm or we get opportunities to keep returning to earth. For the atheists and agnostics, death and dying could be something to be feared but that is only if they have not made peace within themselves that just returning to the bowels of the earth is fine.
So why do most of us cling to life with everything we have if we believe that what happens when we die is much better than this life on earth? This is not a fear held by people of a particular age, race or education. It seems to be a universal situation. Interestingly, as we age the fear of death diminishes and people who have suffered long or become very frail long for the release from this life. Those of us who are younger often lead adventure-filled lives and partake in dangerous activities, and yet we fear death and dying.
I do not profess to have the answer to this question but it is one that often crosses my mind. What do you think?